The sky is blinding blue. The landscape is that of a flat highland of bright green grass so smooth that has a digital quality to it. In the distance we see massive vertical black outcrops raising to the sky but we can’t tell yet if they are rock formations or man-made. Something is certain, they are very far away and if we want to find out a long walk awaits us. Better then not to delay the beginning of our trip. As we approach one of the structures we realize their sheer magnitude is well beyond we could possibly phantom. The one we are approaching reveals to us as a towering forest of black slender skyscrapers so densely packed together that from the distance appears as single body. It dawns into us the realization of the utter vastness of the landscape that surround us and our eyes wander through the plain searching for a taxi but there is none in sight. We search our pockets and we find what we were looking for: narrative omniscience.
Next thing we know we are gliding amidst the colossal structures that are all identical in their design albeit they vary greatly in their heights. All are featureless but for their indistinguishable windows evenly spaced along their dark rusty walls. We randomly chose one of the identical windows that is nearby and very carefully hover towards it in order to avoid breaking our omniscient noses.
The room behind the window is dark, as if the bright light outside failed to pass through the glass as we just did, putting to shame the proud photons that had travel so swiftly to end up bouncing off a humble glass. It is perhaps because their failure that whoever who stays here had to purchase the dim bulb that hangs from the ceiling.
The room is sparsely decorated but ample, although far smaller than the vast landscape we just left behind otherwise this story wouldn’t make any sense.
There is a chair and in the chair there is a man in shorts and the man is holding something that looks like a book but is actually a newspaper. The man seems to be reading his morning paper and drinking from a beer can in his lap. Maybe looking for a position as beer-drinker.
He doesn’t pay any attention whatsoever to a woman who is standing by the kitchen counter doing the dishes until she realizes there are no kitchen in such a sparsely furnished room, she stops and the dishes crash loudly on the floor. She turns her head and we realize with disgust that her eyebrows are upside down. She stares at the man with disdain and frowns and the effect is comic. We suppress a laugh not to reveal ourselves and get in trouble.
– The kitchen is gone and I just broke all we had left for dinner -the woman says to the man.
– Mmmm! – answers the man without looking back
– Did you just listen to what I said? – she yells
– Mmmm! – repeats the man but with more conviction this time around as if he had listened any better to what the woman said, which he hadn’t.
The woman feels she never should have married a deaf-mute man thinking he was a good listener and starts banging her head against the wall.
We feel bored of what is going on here and we realize the dialogue between this two people has great chances of becoming a monologue. So we glide away once more and chose another destination not without leaving a chalk mark in the window sill just in case we spend time in this place, which seems unlikely if all dwellers are as dull as these.
This new room is identical but for the lack of bulb which has been replaced for a candle. The candle is on the floor instead of the ceiling for practical reasons. There is also a man and a woman laying naked on the floor. They seem very excited which is normal in their circumstances. The man is trying without success to introduce his penis in one of the woman’s nostrils but she seems reluctant. She expresses her reluctance by shrieking loudly and waving her arms wildly. Then she produces a manual with drawings on it and shows one of pictures to the man and the man get the right orifice this time and they copulate happily for a while, although she won’t stop neither the shrieking nor the arm waving.
After some copulating the man is sitting in a chair reading the newspaper and drinking from a beer can in his lap while the woman fries the dishes on an kitchen that is not there. We realize they are the same people but apparently we caught them at different time. We decide this is definitely some bizarre place to spend your vacations.